Bingo and the Hot Mess Express™
When large family travel is a comedy of errors and why we do it anyway.
We went to Chicago this past weekend, and like nearly every other Smith Family Outing, it was not without complication. The kids were getting over ear infections + pink eye, and 2/3 of the adults were on the tail-end of an upper respiratory virus. I had stayed clear of it all until it finally caught up with me Friday night. And when it did, it hit hard. Fever, chills, sore throat, and a massive double ear infection. I bought myself a trip to yet another out-of-town urgent care (it’s sort of becoming our thing) for a strep swab and some antibiotics and loaded up on Ibuprofen to fake my way through the rest of the trip. On Saturday, I quietly snuck out of the Museum of Science and Industry to nap in the car while everyone else finished the tour.
While I was curling up in the heated minivan seats, a friend of mine texted, “Geesh woman. I feel for you. What a rough go.”
“Just par for the course around here, you know,” I responded.
When we took a long road trip to Colorado earlier this year, our besties secretly created a BINGO card for our adventures. While we were gone, they asked for updates and chuckled as they filled in square after square.
Someone pukes ✔️ Trip to urgent care ✔️ More than one selfie is taken ✔️ Callan screams about something ✔️
That last one was the free space.
At this point, traveling with our crew is basically a comedy of errors. We’re the physical representation of the Hot Mess Express™, but gosh darn it, we keep trying. We keep packing those bags, loading that van, boarding that airplane. We keep downing the Dramamine, pretending this will be the time it actually works. We hand back the never-ending-snacks and stop for the 40th time to pee and shuffle a horde of humans onto public transportation all in the name of quality family time. And then, inevitably, someone pukes in the train station or winds up in Urgent Care for stitches and antibiotics — and you better believe we document every last chaotic bit of it.
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Because sooner than later, all of the Dollar Tree toys we bought to entertain them in the car will make their way to the trash. The matching outfits they wore will be covered in ketchup stains and caked in dirt. The ice cream they shared at the beach will be long gone, with their sticky, sandy hands just a fleeting memory.
But we take the trips (near and far) and we snap the (sometimes terrible) photos and we freeze the (loud and messy) moments because when all of that other stuff is gone, this is the stuff that sticks around.
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Both of my husband’s parents died young. He was just 23 when his mom passed away in her mid-50’s; his dad died five years later. We never had the chance to take a family vacation with them. We weren’t given the opportunity to look back and laugh at “that one time that Britt heaved her Giordano’s pizza all over the Chicago train station.” There were no knowing glances exchanged between she and I as I chased my feral toddler around museum hallways. I never got to ask, “Was your son like this, too?”
Nothing is promised, and I don’t know how long we’ll have to keep traveling and making memories like this as a family, so I’m going to prioritize it for as long as I can. It may be a complete disaster some days, and in the moment, it might feel like it’s more work than it’s worth, but I know we will never regret the experiences we’re living together. No matter how many bingo cards we fill up along the way.
My Top Ten Travel Must-Haves
Traveling with a large family takes a heck of a lot of coordination and a handful of good Amazon finds. I thought it’d be helpful to share my top ten buys (in no particular order) for traveling with a whole lotta folks at once, especially with tiny humans in tow.
Voyager Beach Blanket by California Beach Co. - we bought this oversized blanket for a spontaneous beach trip in 2020 and it’s been one of our favorite purchases! It’s excellent quality and condenses into a small, drawstring bag for easy carrying. We’ve taken it on every beach trip, used it for multiple picnics at home, and tossed it in the wash more times than I can count. This is a must-have, for sure!
Beach Pop-Up Tent - another beach fave! Again, we purchased this for that 2020 trip and it was a lifesaver with a whole crew of pale, blonde folks on the beach, including an infant. I love that it is fully collapsible and pops up in one step, you just have to add beach sand to weigh it down.
Water Doodle Pens - If your kids are a big fan of the Melissa & Doug Water Wow books, but keep losing the pens (like mine do constantly!), you’ve gotta grab a set of these backup pens/brushes to keep on hand. I bought them for our Colorado trip this Spring to use with our existing books and a handful of water painting books I found at Dollar Tree. So easy and affordable!
Car Seat Organizer Travel Trays - These are perfect for those backseat mess-makers! I love that this particular one comes with a tablet holder and a built-in dry erase board, as well as a cupholder. My boys used these on a flight to Jamaica and it was a lifesaver to have all of their things in one place instead of the tiny plane seat pockets.
Vacuum Storage Bags for Packing - This is one of my best kept secrets for taking long trips with a big family, y’all! I first ventured into vacuum storage bags for packing on one of our Disney trips when I was toting along a full week’s worth of clothing, plus an entire wardrobe of princess dresses to complement each day’s adventure. No way I was getting all of that onto a plane! Enter: vacuum bags. These bad boys take even the biggest, bulkiest items and condense the heck out of ‘em so they fit in your suitcase. We loaded one of these bags up with giant coats, snow pants, and parkas this Spring and it saved us SO MUCH SPACE. Be warned if you’re flying to not be fooled into thinking less space = less weight. Still check those weight limits!
Packing Cubes - I was kind of late to get on the packing cube bandwagon, but I’m glad we did! These were a perfect addition to our packing process alongside the vacuum bags. The girls used them for some of their clothing and we all grabbed one for toiletries. I was surprised at how much they held and how big of a difference they made when put together in a suitcase!
Reusable Sticker Books - What’s better than a giant sticker book? A giant, REUSABLE sticker book! These are great, friends. Super thin, loads of stickers, and cute themes to choose from. I grabbed a couple for the boys on our last trip and it was easy entertainment that I didn’t have to worry about peeling from my windows later!
Busy Board Sensory Book - Okay, this one was a hit! I bought this for our long road trip to Colorado and Callan was obsessed. And honestly, I think the adults were too. So many fun, sensory things to do in this book! I love that it zips up and you can keep all of the pieces together. Disclaimer: you do have to manually add the velcro to everything, but it didn’t take too long with two people doing it.
Self-locking Cell Phone Mount - We trial-and-errored wayyy too many phone mounts before landing on this one. We needed something that was universal for multiple phones, sizes, and styles. We LOVE that this is self-locking with one click and safely adjustable while you drive. Gotta have this for every day, not just road trips!
Shotgun Road Trip Game - This is a fun one! We loaded up on road trip games and activities, but this was a fave for the big kids and the adults. It’s a quick and easy card game, made by the makers of “What Do You Meme?” that you can play as much or as little as you like while you’re traveling. It comes with a travel pouch so you don’t have to carry around a box, too!
*Some affiliate links used. I get a tiny commission at no extra cost to you when you shop through these links.